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Love Makes a Family

Family on a beachPost by Rohmteen Mokhtari, Former HRC Coordinator, Family Project

The fundamental point NOM misses time after time is that love makes a family.

NOM Chairman John Eastman said of adoptive families in an interview with AP earlier this week:

"You're looking at what is the best course society-wide to get you the optimal result in the widest variety of cases. That often is not open to people in individual cases. Certainly adoption in families headed, like Chief Roberts' family is, by a heterosexual couple, is by far the second-best option."

It should be said right off the bat that, from a social science standpoint, Eastman is simply wrong.

Even David Blankenhorn, the star expert witness against marriage equality during the Prop. 8 case, testified that adoptive parents are just as capable as biological parents adding that “the studies show that adoptive parents, because of the rigorous screening process that they undertake before becoming adoptive parents, actually on some outcomes outstrip the biological parents in terms of providing protective care for their children.”

And study after study has confirmed that a parent’s sexual orientation has absolutely nothing to do with their ability to be a good parent.

But factual errors aside, no loving family should be told that they are the “second best option” for their child.

To justify their fight against marriage equality groups like NOM routinely claim that only a biological mother and a biological father can be ideal parents for a child. Their implication, articulated by Eastman, is that any other parental arrangements are, at best, second rate.

But there are plenty of incredible same-sex parents, adoptive parents, single parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles who challenge this notion every day.

By focusing solely on the form that a family takes NOM misses what truly makes a family great: it’s not the genetic bonds that tie them together but the bonds of love and caring.

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