Custody Introduction
Technically speaking, there are two aspects to custody: physical custody, meaning who has the right to have the child live with him or her, and legal custody, which designates who has the right to make major life decisions for the child around issues such as health care and education. These elements may be awarded in different ways. For example, one parent may win both legal and physical custody and the other none; or both may win legal custody while only one may be granted physical custody. Winning or losing custody, in short, may not be an all-or-nothing proposition.
If you are a lesbian or gay parent, however, it is critical that you think about custody issues before an unexpected break-up or death shatters your family, leaving the courts to reorganize the pieces; and recognize that the law that governs custody decisions, like all family law, varies from state to state - and, frequently, county to county or judge to judge. It also varies depending upon whether you are coming out of a heterosexual relationship or a same-sex one. Custody, therefore, is a complicated issue.
It is highly recommended that you consult a competent family attorney who is familiar with lesbian and gay custody issues in your state. An attorney can best consider the facts of your particular situation and advise you about the most recent law in your area. The information provided here is for educational purposes only. It does not represent legal advice.