National Adoption Month: Elizabeth Wall’s Story
November 24, 2009
“Life, Liberty & the Pursuit of Family” is a series of conversations and blog posts celebrating National Adoption Month. This post in the series comes Elizabeth Wall. Elizabeth was adopted by two gay men as an infant. My name is Elizabeth Wall and I was adopted by two gay men. My fathers David and Bob were together for many years before the subject of adopting came up. Having children was one of the only things they disagreed on. Bob had never wanted to have a child, but David, who was a school teacher most of his life, had always dreamed of having children. When David began actively pursuing the idea of adopting a child, Bob left to give David space to live his dream. After around a year of intense paperwork, social service visits, and playing phone tag with the adoption agency, my father David was presented with a beautiful, red-headed little girl, named Elizabeth. A few weeks later (yes, after I was born, haha), my father’s friends threw him a baby shower. Since David and Bob were still close friends, Bob came to celebrate the occasion. After holding me and seeing me in person, Bob decided to second parent adopt me and legally be part of what became our beautiful family. Life progressed very normally from that point on. I lived in a suburban, middle class neighborhood right outside of Princeton, New Jersey. I had friends and loved music and had a puppy named “Bunny.” But there were a few exceptions to my normal childhood. Even though my family was no different from anyone else’s, my parents knew they needed to go into my schools before the school year began to talk to principals and make sure they were aware that even though my family was as loving and whole as any heterosexual family, I did have homosexual parents. I don’t know how they managed it, but my dads did everything right. I never had to wonder what became of my biological parents – when I was ready, I simply asked them and they told me more about my adoption and my birth parents. They never hid anything from me if I was mature enough to question them about it. By doing this, they kept me informed and aware, disproving the common misconception that parents need to “protect” their adopted children from the truth. And in retrospect, I’m glad I took this approach as well. Asking my parents allowed me to learn about my biological family and the adoption process without suddenly being inundated with information – or having it hidden from me all of my life. Now I’m a junior at The College of Wooster in Ohio. I’m an athletic trainer and in a sorority. I’m majoring in Sociology, and preparing to start a Junior thesis project this spring. I love my life and my friends and – most of all – Bob and David, my two loving, quirky, determined parents.
May 17, 2013